Not the Only Ones

wanting from the night
pulling at something
but I don't know
if it's even good for you
is what I need what you need (what you need)

you can't hide from the light
but you'll learn something
and come back soon
I'll find something more to do
I'll make a song to sing (a song to sing for you)

didn't dream the day would come
didn't think this time was done
I rue a few
but always knew
we're not the only ones

this heart's a fright
catches on something
it pulls for you
and I'll come out to see you
I'll bring you plans to change
and times to rearrange

but didn't dream this day would come
didn't think this time was done
I rue a few
but always knew
we're not the only ones
we're not the only ones

to fake forgotten worlds
recover broken pieces
inventing haunts a hundred years or more

you always sound so right
it's always something
but I know you
and I know what wrong can do
I think it's what you need
a place to go back to

didn't dream the day would come
didn't think this time was done
I rue a few but always knew
we're not the only ones

didn't dream the day would come
didn't think this time was done

I always knew
I always knew
I always knew

© Georgia Boyd

Mojave

what you think you know you don't
out here on 58
there's a pass to make it
will I take it?
I think I made a mistake
I got away
and it's calling me back to where
I'm supposed to be
on 58
could I return now?

after all this time
we're not the same
oh, but I still feel it
do you believe it?
yet as I wandered, and as I waited
heaven faded
so you're calling me back to a place
so far away
from 58
would I return now?

I don't know...

I can't tell what is real
when I'm on 58
but is that what I needed
to finally see it?
there is no desert. it's just a dream,
it's just a vision
that is calling me to go back to the place I know
on 58
but I can't leave now
I can't leave now.

© Georgia Boyd Wade - 2009

From Following Sounds

I sometimes notice something new--
his expressions sometimes change.
We flirt as if we haven't met before,
we forget we can be seen.
I imagine us dancing sometimes,
rocking out to air guitar
and sideways glances when we speak
to hide a slight envy.
His wisdom can still impress deeply
and I stop to reflect on it.
I try to use foresight with him.
Sometimes I succeed.
Sometimes I dream we'll have a garden,
also succulents in the kitchen.
I'll bring the potted herbs back inside
when the winter chill arrives.
Sometimes he holds me
and makes me heavy and heated--
too stifled to sleep.
I never dream of him,
but fantasize sometimes.
And he will tell me when he's hungry
or when he wants to make love.
Sometimes I curb his appetite,
sometimes I fulfill his needs.
I used to tell him I would move to Santa Fe
and he would look perplexed.
Now I tell him when I'm angry
and try so hard to compromise.
Sometimes I need to try harder.
We both miss New York.
We both know this might be it.
We're okay with that.

-G.B.W.

Ceres

I didn’t turn around
I didn’t stay a moment longer
so she never knew my name
or taught what could have made me stronger

She’ll never show to me
the roses she bestows her daughters
and that I’ll never be
whose rites she gives by holy waters

Ceres
would you have noticed
if I fell to winter’s growing distance
Ceres
how I long for your forgiveness
for not believing you

A fire could reclaim
that chance for me to overcome
the pleasure from the pain
though I fear the damage has been done

so the dust will gather
from the missing storms and seasons
can I remember all I left behind?

Ceres
would you have noticed
If I fell to winter’s growing distance
Ceres
how I long for your forgiveness

© Georgia Boyd - 2008

Dm Song

you say you want me
but you can’t find a way
I think you had plenty of time, time, time
you can’t deceive me
with those little games you play
you only want to be mine, mine, mine

but it hurts
I know
the pain is in the waiting
and there’s not an end in sight

it’s now or never
do you even have a plan?
all you have to do is give me a sign, sign, sign
but you never came down to LA
I think I know where this is going
somewhere we have to draw the line, line, line

cause it hurts
I know
the pain from all the waiting
when there’s not an end it sight

yes it hurts
I know
the pain from all the waiting
when there’s not an end in sight
you know I’m right

© Georgia Boyd - 2008

He caused me to worry - NYC

oh
Is it really moving?
The feast we started so long ago
Consuming love from '99
or confusing as we go
confusing as we go

oh
New York was like a mirror
A dark reflection of when we were young
I missed the train I wanted
but I caught the number you were on
I caught the number you were on

and oh
If you were lost
were you only searching?
oh
For if you found what you wanted
would it be me?

oh
You might think me weak
to compromise on what I've never owned
I ask myself so many, many times
but the answers stay unknown
The answers stay unknown

and oh
If you were lost
were you only searching?
oh
And did you find what you wanted
and was it me?

But would the music be our child
Ending what we started
Or will this train deliver us...
...brokenhearted

and oh
If you were lost
were you only searching?
oh
And did you find what you wanted
Was it me?
Was it me?

© Georgia Boyd - 2008

thoughts of...

He wrote,
of what
I'll never know.
Of course the ending brought tears.
Of course they were mine.
I left
one gray and foggy morning.
My ghost I took to haunt another.
My ghost never loved him.

Not too cruel,
but bitter-tasting from recollection,
as if infatuation
becomes a stooped old man
angry at my generation.
His pride could divide.
I teased to stay at length,
cautious of every frank utterance
and the wicked sly remarks.

This I know--
that he tempted goodness,
angels falling down to levels
always meant for less deserving.
This I know--
I never flew.
Not a clap of thunderstorms,
not an instinct housed
that led my forward-thinking heart.

Never too sad
about the abandonment
which shaped his present state.
And I think
this is what drew the love
to him.
Not love--
not Real Love--
but the lovers who gave too much.

I'm glad I left.

-G.B.W.